The short version of what I do and teach is: Pay Attention!

The longer version follows.
One measure of success in some interactions is whether or not your partner had a good time. If you are interested in being invited back for more, it is in your best interest to ensure that they enjoy it. If you are smooching madly, doing your own thing and not paying attention to the responses of your partner, it is less likely that you will be invited back.

People will kiss you the way they want to be kissed. If they are delicate and soft, don't come on like a Great White Anteater. You can suggest more intense interactions subtly, and if your partner wants more, they will respond appropriately. They may also let you know if they want more. If you pay attention to their pace, intensity, tongue action, etc, and kiss them similarly, they will be more likely to enjoy the experience.

Keep in mind that some folks won't want anything more than a very light peck, or will want to build gradually. Don't rush it. Alternately, some partners may want to rush into things faster than you meant to. If you're into it, go for it. If not, ask them to slow down and savor things.

Of course, your preferred style and their preferred style may not align. That's fine. I'm not advocating that anyone change their style or not enjoy a kiss just to make their partners happy.

Also, some people may want to be kissed in a way that they don't choose to initiate, (ie: more forcefully). Unless you already know their style or they tell you that, it can be difficult to divine. I personally don't suggest overpowering new partners in the name of science, but that's a personal choice.

Finally, for happy social kissing success, mood and comfort is extremely important. It has worked out well for me to being willing to flirt, smooch, whatever, but also really being OK if it doesn't happen or doesn't go anywhere. Letting go of expectations and being willing to go with the flow. That way the pressure is off of whoever else, and they feel comfortable saying No or Yes, which leads to general good vibes and comfort, which pays off later.

Many (but not all) of the women I kiss socially, I got to know for a while, like months and months, first. That allows that happy, comfy, friendly, safe vibe, where they know it can be just fun and flirty and I won't get creepy or slimy on them. Creepy and slimy is a serious turn-off and won't get you invited back. Comfortable, safe, and fun will get you invited back, and also get their friends looking for you because they heard how great you were.

I'd really enjoy hearing feedback from other folks about this post. Even from those (you know who you are) who think my kissing instruction is bogus. Please chime in!

Would anyone be interested in a kissing workshop? Usually when I teach I'm lecturing the above, not demonstrating, but for this group I might be persuaded to participate.